Commentary by T.W. Bill Neville
So, if you don't mind, I'm going to ask any one reading this article to listen to my story, and maybe that will
clear my mind of this "nagging" feeling that I'm substituting "DREAMING" as a substitute for the reality of losing my wife.
I never used to "dream", she was the "dreamer", and many breakfasts were occupied with her recounting her dreams, while I listened and commented accordingly. Now, I'm the "dreamer", and fortunately, or unfortunately, with one exception, they have all involved her, and incidents we shared over the years.
Just this past week, I awoke from a deep sleep, from such a dream, and spent the rest of the night trying to interpret it's meaning. The only thing I could think of was having just received a very moving "Memorial medallion" keepsake that reads, "Goodbye is not forever. Goodbye is not the end. It simply means, I will miss you, until we meet again."
The significance of this is that she had developed an intense dislike for the word "GOODBYE" and always suggested that "So long" or "See you soon" be used. It took me a little while for me to get her to explain why, and it was simply, upon leaving all the families, up north, "GOOD BYE" sounded too "FINAL", and she might never see them alive again.
This "medallion", coming as it did, just that afternoon, had to have triggered the "DREAM", which was a "replay" of what she went through, every time we left the "families", up-north, over the last 22 years of her life.
THANKS for allowing me to come into "your" lives and "use" your "COUCH" for how ever long it took for you to read my "plea" for solace and quandary relief. IT WORKED! and I can, now, treat the "dreams" as "MEMORIES" and a "CELEBRATION" of the GREATEST TIMES of my LIFE!