Commentary by T. W. Bill Neville
Lo these six plus months of my wife of 65 years passing have been a parade of "UBIQUITOUS" happenings. It seems I can't go anywhere, view TV, listen to radio or CD's without my wife's omnipresence.
I've slowly, but surely, adapted to what could have been an "underwhelming" distraction, among many, that have, and still are, testing my self-confidence, in this, uncharted, chapter in my "life" without my mate of 65, plus years.
Coincidentally, and without any forethought on my part, I've found succor in discovering, in her personal belongings, a vial of her "trademark" perfume, "Clinique", which she had "worn" ,with landmark success, over a period of at least 50 years of our marriage. It never failed, wherever we went, that someone commented and wanted to know the name of her perfume. She even attracted male admirers, leading one daughter in law to, jovially, relate a story where they were together in a beauty salon, that also catered to males. As one male was leaving he stopped by Betty's chair and asked what was that wonderful fragrance? This prompted the daughter in law to comment that he was hitting on an 80 year old while ignoring a "charming" 50 year old. For the "record", although I'm certainly not 50 yrs.old, and certainly not charming, I have found comfort in wearing a single drop on my wrist gives me solace, and a sense of "nearness" and "comfort" in her absence. So "far", no one has made a "pass" at me yet, but I have been avoiding going to the barber shop.
With no connection to how and when my wife died, about ten years into our full time residency in Florida, every time we were with family, up North, she had a growing problem when it was time to head South. That was when I suggested, no "more" saying "GOODBYE." Instead we started saying "So Long." It was just last week while spending Christmas with our South Carolina families, that I came across an ad for a Medallion inscribed "Goodbye is not forever. It is not the end. It simply means, I will miss you until we meet again." As "simply" put as that saying is, "IT" has made my continuing "UBIQUITOUS" existence, just a "little" bit more manageable, and more prepared to deal with a "final" GOODBYE, even, including "my" own.